{ CHAPTER 22 }

At a solemn ceremony Rigmarole was elected our Triboldissimus. He begged inexperience ; he begged ineptitude ; he begged ineffability. His pleas, of course, were ignored. It is a tradition that he who is chosen must not refuse. Rigmarole stated that he would have to rely largely on the advice of such experienced elders as Cantilever and Ottoman.

I was a little surprised that Rigmarole was chosen. Why not Cantilever? More pebbles lay before the smaller flaxen Cantilever than before the smaller flaxen Rigmarole, until the last throw before the sign. Also, a bird's settling in our midst does not seem to be a marked enough sign. When we chose Ocarina (and how did we manage to do that?) we sat in Sparadrap(         )'s wagon. The sign then was that the smaller flaxen Ottoman fell over backwards for no reason (unless somebody pushed it). The smaller flaxen Ottoman this morning, until the last throw, had as many pebbles as the smaller flaxen Rigmarole.

Many of us have now read Ocarina's chronicle; it is kept in the tunnel below Ocarina's Folly (as some, including myself, still call it). All have something to disagree with, but for each who disagrees with one of Ocarina's statements, another agrees. Many, too, have been studying the Secret Journal, reading meaning into the spots scattered on the blank paper; I have decided that some matters were so secret that Ocarina did not dare to write them, for fear of the journal finding its way into the hands of others.

Perhaps the ancients were mistaken in deciding that there should be only one chronicler - it might have been better for truth if we had all written our own journals, and, when we had arrived, had argued over every glyph. Who knows? Perhaps at this moment, there are perhaps dozens of secret journals being written on secret ink, in secret books. And were I keeping one, dare I mention it, in this official chronicle? Already Rigmarole, in a way rather daring for him, has thought aloud that Sparadrap(          ) was not wise when he chose Ocarina to be chronicler. And perhaps (though Rigmarole did not say so) Ocarina was not wise when he agreed to choose me.

New knowledge has come, about Ocarina's experience in the valley of Tinutroppo. In his journal he remarks about Peccadillo and Cumulonimbus, who were "last seen disappearing into a thicket several days ago with two Troppo maidens." Little Buxtehude told Asa Nisi Masa that he (far above, on the rocatross's back) saw Ocarina earnestly talking to two Troppo maidens, trying to entice them to perform for him the notorious Troppo rite of friendly greeting. They were laughingly refusing him by pretending disagreement about who was to untie her pantaloon-flowers first, when Peccadillo and Cumulonimbus strolled by. The two maidens raced off after Pecco and Cumu. Ocarina shouted incoherently after the four. Buxtehude laughed so much that the rocatross landed in fright, at Ocarina's feet. After that, Ocarina would never speak to Buxtehude, and glared at him whenever they met. (And the laughing four have not been seen since.)

I have been trying to find triboldies willing to search the cellars and dumps of Gnixing for the now much-despised Great Mother-Fungus; but nobody wants to leave their cosy new hearths. Without the Fungus, we cannot produce Uunuur, and lacking Uunuur we cannot seek the Universal Strophe, nor (some maintain) the Infinite Unguent. All triboldies, except a restless few, have fallen into lassitude. Most rise late in the morning, eat a cabbage, sit in the sunlight for an hour or two, then eat another cabbage, after which they doze in the sun, blink twice, rest again, eat another cabbage, and return to their beds. Even I am overcome by this lethargy, and slept four days of the last six. What agony it is to be liable to boredom, but to be idly enough inclined to worry about the boredom rather than to resolve it! But what of our bold 880? It must be time to look for them. I shall see Rigmarole tomorrow.

A moon or two later.

Today I went to Rigmarole and asked him: "What shall we do about Indigophera, Angerthas, Jabberwocky, Certiorari, Oberammergau, Hobbledehoy, Montezuma, Tashilhumpo, Tuttendario, Bandersnatch, Afrormosia, Corroboree, Enthusiasmus, Niminy Piminy, Nocturnalitis, Omphalocentric, Northumbria, Jacomart, Osphresiolagnia, Zachojadkin, Melanesia, Micronesia, Polynesia, and Indianesia, Hotchpotch, Orang Outang, Sanctimonius, Incunabula, Orbicula, Drosophila, Metamorphosis, Ubiquinasterism, Crackiottomy, Oriflamma, Cassegranary, Terminologarithm, Garibaldi, Pabulum, Maglemose, Tardenoisi, Pachydermata, Dordogondola, Azcalasema, Crestiyanka, Paddywack, Palatiniat, Terry Tory Yality, Hubbubbubbu, Bocnroc, Curriculi Curricula, Wessagentsia, Archilochus, Maria Juana, Panachea, Coroollari, Surrogaticum, Vivisector, Vercingetorix, Gangangar, Redcurrantface, Yoknapatawha, Megalomania, Kalliwoda, Ambumanikin, Skedaddle, Zinjanthropus, Teratoma, Honorificabilitudina tatibus, Candlebar, Interalia, Moribundle, Chernozem, Zigguratic, Diddles von Diddlesdorf, Septizonium, Sarcophaginia, Calcuttacottacats, Erebustopicall, Pausanias, Cherrapunji, Frumioso, Borogrove, Dan de Lion, Pendulumberjack, Garibalding, Gondolamesiat, Irrelohe, Anaximander, Hiroshima, Umpslopogas, Syndromedary, Smorgasbord, Ozymandias, Dreadnought, Hippodrome, Fujiyama, Mississippi, Clandestinious, Verbigeranda, Tarentellme, Bundestaggers, Yoghorticu, Balderdash, Tuscaloosa, Vanillavilla, Cornucopia, Bombadillion, Cantankeroso, Wilberforce, Gingembre, Zizinazi, Namby Pamby, Olive Green, Cheswits, Zetareticuli, Cancrizans, Rhodiaceta, Interreginald, Malentendu, Impropaganda, Hyperbola, Mundugumor, Pennsylvania, Torquemada, Sdrucciola, Gallimaufry, Wooloomooloo, Didgeridont, Hridhvalier, Stongamanick, Kittikachorn, Knickerbocker, Macadamant, Minderbinder, Fonsetorigo, Misericord, Questionnairy, Inglenook, Weasel Nook, Spatulopia, Wobbledywook, Pulcinella, Mistigris, Deuteronomy, Fatinitza, Pyxidium, Foozlepuss, Hanniballismus, Hunkydory, Chitterling, Gerry Mander, Hebdomadal, Pantechnicon, Wentletrap, Tyrotoxicon, Pennyroyalty, Extravaganza, Scatophago, Havildar, Gravamina, Etadidnae, Oubangui Chari, Nathanometer, Chicoutimi, Nebuchadnezzar, Snagglepuss, Randolphineas, Oobooglunk, Polly Dipsere, Somnambula, Hypnopompia, Coprophagia, Cacafogo, Idioglossia, Plunderbund, Chthulhu, Khovanschina, Hemballistick, Parapletiga, Alifanfaron, Harakiriana, Amblyopia, Coccygodynia, Erythromelalgia (!), Juggernauticalf, Chincherinchee, Custardcups, Antipasto, Bouillabaisse, Rentinorrhoea, Munimini, Plantagenet, Tuldander, McMillimillimillion, Lacitametham, Hohenzollern, Thixotropy, Cochineal, Desdemona, Nhosslednem, Hodgy Podgy, Callocalia, Nibelungenlieder, Asturiask, Weylawei, Senfgurken, Zabaglione, Maraschino, Angostura, Aristophantom, Brekkekex, Eulenspiegelatindia napolis, Lacimontsaria, Ezitamilica, Metamasquero, Herstedvester, Kamchatka, Skravdraa, Emmargrop, Zingelbong, Finkelstein, Salamanca, Tudelidixus -"

Here Rigmarole interrupted me. "The Next?" he queried.

"The Antepenultimate," I replied, and went on: "Pojoripockidickius, Tudelidixus -"

Rigmarole stopped me again. "The First?" he asked. I shook my head, and went on: "The More than Last, Bartholomumu, Pthwndxr*clzp, Tudelidixus -"

"The Next?"

"No!" I said, frowning. "The Last. Hexachlorophene, Fattidomens, Medlidande, Nabucodonosor, Madagascony, Manikavasagam, Ankarafantsika, Rabindranath, Schnackenberg, Tralfamadore, Lohopajuihirka, Anthelminica, Jambolina, HeIiogabalus, Epithalamion, Tictactoe, Voltefascia, Trafalgar, Tulipomania, Phantasmagoria, Hyperspasticus, Hammurabi, Pocahontas, Nomignolo, Atosennim, Nobodaddy, Hapaxlegomenon, Herpezoster, Tudelixus -"

"Not the First?"

I nodded, and went on: "Nosnikpoh & Nosnibor, Trichlorocarbanilide, Dendroglyph, Studelistixus" (I pronounced this very clearly) "Chiaturmagnets, Borroloola, Machinazhauri, Tudelidixus -,"

Rigmarole opened his mouth, but I pressed on: "- the Other, Stroimashina, Zzmmrnrmmzz, Wissenschaft, Karakorum, Eschscholtzia, Troglodyptarine, Genuvarus & Genuvulgum, Cholelithium, Steatopygia, Bratkartoffeln, Gorgonzola, Pumpernickel, Kuttelflecke, Pamplemousse, Mulligatawny, Pomodoro, Topinambour, Curragundi, Kalanganda, Murrumbung & Murrumbong, Pilliethillcha, Tutinacoco, Electrostasy, Obsolesco, Madzimbamuto, Brisingamen, Coquelicot, Coquecigrue, Multigravida, Chalkoslovakia, Domoladossa, Nun-a-wadding, Sharawadgi, Sendivogius, Flottalauro, Melchisadek, Carpentaria, Magnanimi, Amanuensis, Frontignac, Tisoucierna, Minnieappleless, Annalivia, Abednego, Vulpecula, Nubercula, Stellaphane, Funicularty, Camemberty, Spikaspanker, Flibbertigibbet, Zittersteyne, Metamathemalicality, Mithridata, Primavera, Zarathrustra, Merovingianz, Cassiopeia, Cirabrab, Chandra Chowringhee, Zoroaster, Xanadudah,"

- and here I paused for a moment, took a breath, then went on: "Zubelgenubi, Rasalhague, Aldebaran, Venaticorum, Pyriphlegathon, Xerticon, Shitarangski, Candelabra, Loewenguthtavuth, Sirosio, Magnitogorsk, Akcibzriew, Panapona, Pompidextrous, Kalicanthus, Puchtekotamot, Tinopuckech, Yror Wywdfa, Lanigiriba, Hagoromo, Ycarcolytheme, Salazarello, Periplum, Balthazar, Heretaunga, Santayana, Sigismundo, Hamilcarton,"


{ CHAPTER 23 }

"Elibommuuteprep, Quinqulquoq, Katzenjammering, Balighieri, Avicenna, Thelonious, Eleutherio, Tutankhamen, Krumwinkle, Xoirempers, Pneumonious, Cunnimundus, Theodolinda, Coccinella, Girigogolo, Broncopolmonite, Iatagano, Labdacimoso, Guastastomaco, Arruffamatasse, Inghirami, Sklodilowopovo, Haogunduo, Ciurmadore, Falsariga, Zoomoozophone, Ornitomanzia, Fanghiglia, Addiacciamento, Lusinghevolme, Zangolatura, Zuzzurullona, Piccolomini, Tamarillo, Bonssingault, Nairbeutachad, Ituglomania, Hectatoria, Wargentina, Massachutoes, Cingalessenx, Oenipides, Wrottesley, Sacrobosco, Epoxodeilax, Winterhalter, Alpetragius, Fracastorius, Abenezra, Longomontanus & Regiomontanus, Arambouvil, Rhadamanthus, Chiaroscuro, Glauconomic, Catechumen, Monomotapa, Amphitryoblofose, Bastinada, Broceliande, Rendmomency, Dreifusismo, Questambert, Ragusyelrab, Hebdomadomadom, Afyonkarahisar, Raknashivar, Killiecrang, Epipsychidion, Aberystwyst, Gangliaglioma, Mandoudhlon, Rothiemurchus, Ardamurchan, Manzikert, Trivandrum, Ordzhonikids, Drakensberg, Lumphanan, Kiskungloxavom, Yackandandah, Amanzimtoti, Wackerstrum, Castleplonk, Mallaramy, Bosmolina, Wagbalemar, Clonkakitty, Coonabarabran, Gongolagon, Wildgoosechase, Sarsaparilla, Kerguelen, Flabbergastavus, Monasterile, Kandalaxha, Poinsettia, Quachasnec, Ootacamund, Athabasca, SIurlu Huba, Benjamin Frankless, Vertigoner, Moleculi Molecula, Anna Sthesia, Mesopotamia, Goggomobil, Kyabetsu, Duelechtrich, Alopecia, Cagastrica & Iliastrica, Bocibafib, Meritorium, Honorarium, Hoshtikikolai, Brandenburg, Cerevissa, Agesttima, Alocacoc, Khachaturismo, Ysopussy, Tritorium, Tribliotonic, Jujunaut, Lixiviu, NauthkorrhĻa, Bizzarney, Perhentian, Snoitagenba, Rabeloia, Ranunculus, Petroselina, Plurabelle, Quatrefoil, Tintyfoil, Chillicloth, Sarreguemines, Melaesthesia, Higgle Piggle, Pontoppidan, Asterisky, Paracumquat, Steptojazyma, Pallyollogass, Pruny-Quetch, Canzicnal, Salmonella, Serengeti, Round Barton, Mesothelioma, Escherichia, Briesemeister, Quarticauthali, Pellucider, S. Hertogenbosch, Drozzera, Fillyjonk, Sugarstove, Cactopus, Melofant, Cheeseturf, Tobias Tobias, Ecstasy-In-Peanutsville, Munglega Barbara Yaga, Daniel Dribbel, Marinucci de Brucci, Wulfila, Herbigura, Hectorvector, Topsy Turvy, Epidemick, Buzlebeeb, Positunio, Cornelius, Theseus da Greseus & Miserigutz, Whimsy Whamsy, Victamatix, Theophilosophia, McFucknuckle, Cankedort, Swivelhips, Penumbria, Quadragesima, Geronimomento, Tweedlebom, Pumblechook, Snickersnack, Snickersnee & Snickersnorum, Feefifofum, Heeby Jeeby & Colly Wobbly, Smithereens, Flimflam, Klopstock, Baccarattler, Cocacolonization, Dogostrophe, Apistrophe, Volcanina, Fellatello, Taciturnki, Thesaurus, Ignorotamus, Hypotenuseles, Desperadontle, Miles Long, Floccinauci, Lamentarsi, Scaramouche, Sandarac, Mongu Lealui, Gambogre, Turmeric, Napthaphthisis, Tragacanth, Sarcocolla, Indianesia, Spermaceti, Sassafras, Citronella, Barbadoe, Al Abaster, Mahagonny, Lapis Lazuli, Constantinosepull, Grimalkin, Quakershake, Cinnabar, Twangdillo, Ceruseby, Viridian, Smaragdabla, Chrysocolla, Jackulatorio, Verdigris, Ambergris, Elbogris, Hoitus Toitus, Aelia Laelia Crispis, Yoickersville, Cenerentola, Zaffrobodoca, Cunnilingam, Eschelidoine, Safflower, Ouagadougou, Plumbagoop, Katakana, Quinquequento, Pantherchrist, Gilgameshopotamia, Putrefactio, Beelzebubba, Euronymus, Harlequintuple, Morpurgo, Plutomato, Braggadocio, Proserpine, Ahasuerus, Azucena, Finnergal, Levithiantic, Bilharzia, Megoboo, Luciferrous, Aldiborontiphoscophornio, Voltastomaco, Succor-benoth, Chamonixon, Melusina, Mandragora, Ariel's Cuccu, Behemothballs, Asmodeus, Nuremberger, Axungia, Withermere, Saveloyal, Pandorian, Almaviva, Macaronici, Dr Pronsky, Skidbladnir, Carnivorum, Eurekovitch, Pantalunatic, Emphatical, Cauliflower, Ichabodiover, Akoozab, Confibuncius, Beetlejuice, Cyclamen, Paracentigradus, Kalokagathia, Callipygoose, Insecti¨oid, Newsmobile, Luminarich, Melanion, Dahomey, Shimpel-glinker, Volvox, Scenedesmus, Xiphocaris, Cantharides, Scramasax, Mondongo, Hotchi-witchi, Hambugger, Justifine, Puddendix, Tetragrammaton, Jellybeaneather, Saurauiaceae, Wormscrubs, Sugarbeethoven, Infinitum, Hullabaloo, Shrimpanzee, Marmaladyladymalady, Maganturl, Fredric Cedric, Snottingham, Hirundaria, Hippuris, Hermodactylus, Melleborne, Flammula, Equisetum, Cubebobu, Malayalam, Capsicumber, Zauberflotilla, Alcofribas, Lionspaw, Chrystostomy, Artemisia Abrotanum, Tessellata, Struthio, Gesenius, Draculella, Dracunculus, Dranunculunculus, Dranunculuncununculus, Dracuncumunculuncumuncununculunculus," - I took another breath.

"And the remaining Tudelidixii?" Rigmarole politely enquired.

"Yes!" (I panted) "The First, The Original, The Only, the Not Only, and the Next. Also Oo Aa, Rolomandri, Durdalezzimus, Manxamillion, Magnalia, Azothimuth, Bufonaria, Aristolochy, Lepidoptera, Chervillinous, Cory and a, Anglosaxophone, Simeon Stylisticus, The Bishop of Boojumberg, Yle, Theriospodium, Ugurugu, Laudameritum, Likafuligo, Micumbergolley In A Foudebolley, Kibricconic, Gamalei, Chalcedony, Bustarella, Cerpigo, Calcatrippa, Calendula, Aphidrodisia, Cardamom, Tronossa, Tithymal, Frittany, Meligris, Myrobolanum, Opopanax, Cinquefoil, Entelechup, Imbrocata, Ishbosheth, Malagrowther, Poodesoy, Contango, Bannalanna, Mournival, Haruspex, Salmagundi, Gargagousier, Nuccalaunder, Fultumian, Xanthophore, Saippuakauppias, Hwcubites, Knipperdolly, Alchemilla, Lapsucalamity, Mafacumbi, Torricelli, Loquifer, Ornitorinco, Tartaruga, Manzanilla, Sintiloola, Steppenwolf, Woonsocket, Kinnikinnik, Gonteryblablabla, and Sraildedniwtsegnolruofoseliatdechtertsrafethnathneveregn-olollafoemantsegnoleththiwydlobirtethemthiwtluxe?"

As soon as I had recovered my breath, Rigmarole answered that he had been giving this matter some of his most serious thought; that he had even gone so far as to ponder upon it. He had been thinking of a small expedition, composed of the boldest and most reckless among us ; among which he did not care to include himself.


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