NICOLAS KLIM’S UNDERGROUND JOURNEY
by Ludvig Holbergtranslation © Dennis List, 2003
CHAPTER 9: PART 1
In which the author is sent off to discover the rest of the planet.
On the author's journey around the planet Nazar
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Having stayed for two years in the boring job of King's Messenger, and carried the royal mandates and letters patent to every province of the empire, I finally tired of this troublesome and unworthy position. So again and again I petitioned his Serene Highness to grant me an honourable dismissal. At the same time I was looking for another job. However I had nothing but rejection from his Highness, who kept saying that I was incapable of more important work. He added that the laws of Potua gave me no hope, because they permitted only fit and proper people to demanding government posts. Therefore, he said, I must make a virtue of necessity, and make myself contented, till I had done something to make me deserve a better fate. He ended with the words of the poet:
Metiri se quemque suo modula ac pede fas est.These repeated refusals spurred me on to ingenious and desperate plans. From that day onward, I stretched my imagination to produce something that would demonstrate my genius and wipe out my previous notoriety.
E coelo magnum descendit [Nosce teipsum aut gnothi seauton],
Figendum ac memori tractandum pectore.So for a whole year I studied the laws and customs of the country with great thoroughness, trying to find any defect that needed correction. I revealed my plan to a certain bush, with whom I had become very friendly. I used to talk freely with him on all topics, whether serious or light. He thought my plan was not totally absurd, but severely questioned whether it would be of any use to the state. He added that it should be the business of any reformer to completely master the nature of the country he means to reform, because the same remedy in different countries might produce different effects - just as the same medicine may be good for some bodies while unhealthy for others. Likewise, he warned me of the danger I was exposing myself to with this experiment. My life would depend on it, because I would have to die if my project had the ill luck of being condemned by the judges. So he begged me to think about it more. However, he did not totally dissuade me from the plan: he thought it possible that a brain like mine might have a slight chance of discovering something useful for the State, as well as for myself.
I took my friend's advice. For a while I laid aside my scheme, and patiently continued my duties, by visiting the various cities and provinces of the kingdom in the usual way. These constant expeditions gave me a chance of making inquiries into conditions in the kingdom, as well as in bordering countries. In case I should forget what I'd seen on my travels, I wrote it all down in a small book, and humbly presented it to the Prince.
Later it became clear that he was much taken with this book. He commended my work before the full Senate. Having read my book closely, he decided to employ me in making a further expedition around the whole planet of Nazar. I had expected a different reward for my work, but was forced to agree with the poet that
...Virtus laudatur et alget.However, since I was fond of novelty, and hoped that such a bountiful Prince would not leave me unrewarded on my return, I set about this work with a good deal of pleasure.The whole sphere of the planet Nazar, though only 600 miles in circumference, appears immense to its inhabitants, because they move so slowly. Therefore many countries, specially the more remote ones, are unknown to the natives. A Potuan would be hard put to cover his globe on foot in two years. What embarrassed me most as the fear I had of difficulty with a great variety of languages. I was pleased when I heard that all the inhabitants of the planet, though differing greatly in their customs, all spoke the same language. Besides, this, the whole race of trees was in the main harmless, sociable, and well-intentioned. Thus I could, with not danger, tour the whole planet. This increased my keenness, and in the month of Poplars I began my journey.
What follows is so marvellous that it seems more like poetic fiction (or the chimeras of ungoverned fancy) than reality - specially because of the great physical and mental variations that you would never expect to find, even between the most distant countries. Many kingdoms here are separated by seas and straits, just as in Europe. Few people cross these straits, but to help travellers there are ferrymen that stay on the banks, ready to transport passengers. The natives seldom venture beyond the boundaries of their own country, and if they must do so they return as quickly as possible, as if impatient to be on foreign soil. This means that there are as many new worlds as there are nations.
The main cause of the difference is the varying nature of the lands: the different surface colours, and the surprising differences between the plants, herbs, and fruits. Therefore it is not surprising that with diverse soils and different plants there should be an equally great diversity of inhabitants, of different natures and tempers.
In our own world, even remote nations differ little from each other in genius, manners, learning, shape, and colour. Since the nature of the earth is the same almost everywhere, except that some parts are more fertile than others, and since our plants and water are nearly the same everywhere, nothing uncommon is produced. But in this subterranean planet, every piece of land has its own peculiarity. Strangers are allowed to trade and to travel, but not to work abroad. Nor would this be possible, considering the great variation of characters in each country on Nazar.
The countries bordering Potua are almost the same as that country. Their citizens were formerly at war with the Potuans, but now they are either in alliance with them, or - having been subdued - they are content in their subjection to such a mild power. But when you cross the great sea that divides this whole globe, new scenes appear, with strange new creatures unknown to the Potuans. The only thing they have in common is that all the creatures of this globe are rational trees, and all speak the same language. This makes travelling very pleasant, specially as the merchants and foreigners, as they pass through every province, give people a chance to see creatures that are extremely strange and unlike themselves.
I thought it best to say the above, in case tender ears should be offended by what follows, and I should be reproached for exaggeration. It would be a tiresome task to repeat every single thing that I experienced on my travels. So let it suffice that I give an account of only those peoples whose characteristics are unusual enough that, because of them, the planet Nazar can be regarded as one of the oddities of the universe. I should point out that this whole race of rational trees differ little in judgement from the Potuans, but in their customs and their characteristics there is so much variation that every province seems like a new world.
Concerning Quamso
In the province of Quamso, which is the first across the sea, the inhabitants are subject to no diseases, but they all enjoy perfect health from youth to old age. I couldn't help thinking that they must be the happiest mortals. But as soon as I came to know them, I found that I was greatly mistaken. Though, on one hand, I never saw a tree who was sad, I also never saw one that was joyful. Just as we never enjoy the serenity of the heavens, unless we have experienced hardships of the weather, these trees know no pleasure, because their life is always perfect. Because they do not know the misery of disease, they cannot enjoy their good health.
Their life is a round of indolence. Their pleasures are never exquisite, for only those who have their pleasures seasoned with a little pain can taste the sweets of life. I declare that I never found in an country on the race of the ear such lifeless creatures, or such cold and insipid conversations. The people are harmless, but deserve neither your love nor your hatred. You fear no affront, and you expect no favour. In a word, there is nothing here either to please or displease.
In addition to that, because eternal health never presents the image of death before their eyes, nor ever gives them concern about the afflicted and diseased, they pass their days in dull security, and never know the generous warmth of pity and compassion - not the least footsteps of love, or any such tender affection. In truth, diseases remind us of our mortality; encourage us to die well, and keep the soul ready for its journey to the world from which nobody returns. Though diseases afflict us with pain, they also inspire sympathy to fellow-sufferers. This led me to see just how much illness and the danger of death contribute to charity, love, and all the social affections - and that people unjustly complain about their Creator for creating ill-health, which in truth brings so much advantage. I should add that these trees from Quamso, when they go to other places, are exposed to the same perils as anybody else. This proved to me that their advantage - if indeed it is an advantage - is due only to their climate.
Concerning Lalac
The province of Lalac, also known as Mascatta or "the blessed" seems to correspond with its name. There, the earth produces everything spontaneously,
Flumina jam lactis, jam flumina Nectaris ibant,But this extraordinary situation doesn't make the natives one jot happier. Because they need not work to procure their sustenance, they spend their days in softness, sloth, and luxury - and so lay the foundation of innumerable diseases and untimely death. The nature of this country affords serious reflection for us. In particular, it appears, from the condition of the people, that farm workers servants and labourers are far happier than those who, free from the fatigue of providing for themselves, are devoted to idleness and pleasure.
Flavaque de viridi stillabant ilice mella:
Ipsa quoque immunis, rastroque intacta, nec ullis
Saucia vomeribus, per se dabat omnia tellus.Nempe inamarescunt epulae sine fine petitae,Thus there follows a sequence of vicious actions, desperate resolutions and violent deaths, which are very common here. The great affluence they live in finally wears away all taste and sense of pleasure; it almost infallibly produces a downright loathing of life. So this region, which first appeared like the Abodes of the Blessed, was in reality a seat of sorrow, and to me more an object of compassion than envy.
Illusique pedes vitiosum ferre recusant Corpus...Concerning Mardak
The next province is Mardak. Here they are all cypresses, all the same shape and height. Only their eyes differ Some have long eyes, some have square eyes. Some have small ones, and some have eyes so large that they take up the entire forehead. Some are born with two eyes, others with three, and some with four. There are also those who have only one eye. These might be considered the offspring of Polyphemus - except that their one eye is in the back of their head. Therefore, according to the different shapes of their eyes, they are divided into many tribes.
NAMES OF TRIBESThe most numerous tribe (so naturally the most powerful) is the Nagiri: those with long eyes, to whom everything looks long. This tribe produces the senators, the priests, and the government office-bearers. These sit at the helm, and do not admit anybody from another tribe to a government post unless he confesses (and confirms his confession with an oath) that a certain tablet, dedicated to the sun and placed in the most conspicuous part of the temple, appears long to him.
1. Nagiri, or those who have long eyes. Consequently, every object appears long to them.
2. Naquiri, those who have square eyes.
3. Talumpi, with small eyes.
4. Jaraku: those who have two eyes, one more oblique than the other.
5. Mehanki: three eyes.
6. Tarrasuki: four eyes.
7. Harramba: those whose eyes occupy their entire forehead.
8. Skadolki: those who have only one eye, in the back of the head.This sacred table of the sun is the main object of the Mardakanian worship. Hence the most honest citizens, who decline to take part in perjury, are excluded from all public honours. What is worse, they are exposed to a thousand sneers, jeers, and even persecution. Though they protest over and over again that they cannot disbelieve their eyes, they are still complained about. What is only a fault of nature is blamed on their obstinacy and malice.
The form of the oath which everybody admitted to public employment and honours must subscribe to is this:
Kaka manasca quihompu miriac Jacku mesimbriiIn other words: "I swear that the sacred tablet of the sun appears long to me, and I promise I will persist in this opinion to my last breath." After this oath, they are declared fit to serve the state, and are incorporated into the Nagiri tribe.
Caphani Crukkia Manaskar Quebriac Krusundora.The day after I arrived, as I was sauntering in the marketplace, I saw an old man who they were hurrying away to be whipped. A large crowd of cypresses followed him, scoffing and reviling him. When I asked the cause of this, I was told that he was a heretic, who openly taught that the tablet of the sun seemed square to him, and that he had obstinately persisted in that diabolical opinion, after repeated warnings.
This aroused my curiosity to visit the temple, to try out whether or not I had orthodox eyes. I examined the aforesaid tabled with all the eyes I had, and really it seemed square to me. this I ingenuously told my host, who at that time held the post of Aedile. With that, he gave a deep sigh and confessed to me that it looked square to him too, but he dare not say so in public, for fear of being dismissed by the governing tribe.
All pale and trembling, I left this terrible city, in fearing that my back must expiate my eyes' crime - or, branded with the title of heretic, I should be ignominiously expelled from their dominions. No place ever appeared to me more barbarous, horrid and unjust than this, where hypocrisy and perjury alone are he avenues to promotion.
When I returned to the Potuans, I took every chance to express my indignation against that detestable race of people. But while I was in one of my angry moods, I was venting my spleen in my usual way, to a certain juniper tree, with whom I had lived in a degree of intimacy. His reply: "It is true that the conduct of the Nagiri seems absurd and iniquitous to Potuans, but it shouldn't seem at all strange to you that this diversity of eyes should cause such cruelty, because you have previously told me that in most of Europe there are governing tribes that attack the rest with fire and sword on account of some defect - not their eyes, but their reason. And you yourself praised such a proceeding as a pious act, and an advantage to the government."
I soon understood the meaning of this comment, and blushed with shame. I left him soon after that, but was for ever after a staunch advocate of toleration, entertaining milder thoughts of those who lived under error.
Concerning Kimal
Kimal, the next principality, is regarded as the most powerful, because of its immense wealth. Besides the abundant silver mines, vast quantities of gold are gathered from the sands of their rivers. Their seas, too, produce pearls of great value. Yet , studying this country, I realized that happiness did not consist in wealth alone. Half the inhabitants were divers and miners, who, bent on gain, seemed condemned to perpetual slavery, such as seemed fit only for criminals. Those who are rich enough to be exempted from these toils are obliged to keep constant watch. The whole country is so infested with robbers that it is not safe to go anywhere without a guard.
Non tam festa dies, ut cesset prodere furem,Thus this nation, regarded with envy by its neighbours, inspired me more to pity than to envy. Fear, jealousy, suspicion, and distrust reign in every mind; everybody regards his neighbour as a plotting enemy. Thus endless solicitude, wasteful worries, and pallid complexions are the fruits of the boasted pleasures of this province.
Perfidiam, fraudes, atque omni ex crimine lucrum.
Vivitur ex rapto; non hospes ab hospite tutus,
Non socer a genero, fratrum quoque gratia rara est.
Filius ante diem patrios inquirit in annos;
Victa jacet pietas, et virgo caede madentes
Ultima coelestum, terras Astraea reliquit.It was not without anxiety that I travelled in this area. In every road, and on every frontier I was obliged to give an account of my business, name, and country, to the guards and examiners. I found myself exposed to all those vexations which travellers experience in countries that are jealous of strangers. There is a volcano, or burning mountain, in this province, from which ascend perpetual whirlwinds of fire.
Concerning Quamboia
After travelling around this principality (with more trouble than I experienced anywhere else in my whole journey) I moved on to the east. Everywhere I found the people sociable and well behaved, but very paradoxical. The natives of the little kingdom of Quamboia surprised me most. There, the order of nature is inverted. The older the natives become, the more wanton they grow. Age produces the lascivious vices that only young people are guilty of elsewhere. The only people here entrusted with the affairs of state are those under forty years of age. When they become older, they are too giddy for business, like children:
...quem dura premit custodia matris.Here I saw old people frisking in the streets like boys, and spending their time with childish diversions. As the poet says, they didAedificare casas, plostello adjungere mures,The youths, on the other hand, took the liberty to reprove the old people, and sometimes drove them home with a whip. I saw a decrepit old male tree whipping a top in the marketplace, and was told that some years ago he was a very important person, the President of the Grand Council, no less.
Ludere par impar, equitare in arundine longa.This inverted order was also true of the weaker sex. Thus when a certain youth was to be married to an old lady, everybody thought he must undergo the fate of Actaeon. This is diametrically opposite to what happens among us, where if an old man wants a young bride, he has ample reason to fear an injury of that sort. Once I remember I met two old bald-heads taking part in a duel. Amazed to find such vigour at such an age, I asked about the cause of this duel, and was told that the quarrel had arisen about a mistress they had met at one of their haunts, who had equally attracted them both. My informants added that if the guardians of these two old sinner know about their disagreement, their backs would be sure to smart for it. The same evening a report flew about that a certain old matron had hanged herself in despair, after being repulsed by a young beech who she loved.
This inverted order of nature demands, naturally, an inversion of laws. Hence in their law on guardianship it is enacted that nobody shall administer goods unless he is under forty years old. Moreover, contracts are deemed invalid if entered into by persons aged over forty - unless the contracts are signed by their teachers or children. In the law on obedience it is stated that "the aged of both sexes shall be subservient to their children." Every officeholder is dismissed before reaching the age of forty, and...
interdicto huic omne adimat jusI did not think it a good idea to stay any longer in this place. Had I stayed there ten years, I should have been obliged by law to become a child again.
Praetor, et ad juvenes abeat tutela propinquos.